Return to Corporate World - The start of Working Mommy life!!

If you have been here before, you might know that I changed gears of my life at the end of 2015. From being a full-time IT engineer I went on to be a housewife. For those of you who are new here - yes, I quit my corporate job of almost a decade and ended up being a stay-at-home mom to my little one. That wasn't the plan though!

When I thought about having a baby, I never thought about quitting my job but circumstances at that point in time made me quit. It didn't make any sense to me or to the people around me but as they say, you can only join the dots backward. Those circumstances were universe's way of telling me - you are going to have your hands too full to do anything else for the next few years. And boy oh boy, my little boy!! I would never be able to decide whether he is more cute or more naughty :D :D Such are the joys of motherhood!!

Cut to 2018 and my boy is now more than 2 years and has started going to school (insert proud mom face here :P). So what if he's just going to a playschool. So what if I burn a hole in my pocket to let him play in someone else's premises. It's still a school :P. I digress. He is in school and I am back in the corporate world. Just the way universe pointed me to stay-at-home, the universe pushed me back to work as well. Coz this wasn't the plan either!

Here's The Deal - I am not ready to let go!!

How long does it take to let go? There are some experiences and some snapshots of our life that are forever etched in our mind. We call them memories. Of the times when we were happy or sad or ecstatic or in love or betrayed. These are emotions that come to life when you relive a memory.

I am lucky to have a lot of these - memories - good and bad. Right from my school days - of friends that I didn't consider close back then but have taught me so much in hindsight. Of friends that loved me then and love me now. Of friends that I thought I wouldn't survive without but don't really matter anymore. And of friends who betrayed my trust. It's been a few years and then some years and then some more (God, I am old😛) since I got out of school. But the memories are still fresh - as a HD picture. A Picture!!

The good ones used to make me laugh and cry at the same time and the bad ones stung for a long long time. And then at some point of time they stopped stinging. I guess I let go of the emotions attached. The vision is still as fresh and the memory is clear but it doesn't hurt me anymore. Doesn't bring about any emotions. And that's what worries me!!

I have some extremely happy memories of my life in the past few years. The ones that made me smile, the ones that shaped my life and the ones that I want to hold on to forever. Coz that's all I have right now - memories. I know I won't be able to live those moments again. Each time I think back to any of those beautiful days my heart skips with joy. I can relive any of these moments and be happy even on the worst days. Sometimes that's what keeps me going.

With my school time memories, I didn't let go of the emotions intentionally. I guess they just died inside me. The heart breaks, the tears and the betrayal (that's seems like the theme of this post 😛) just stopped hurting. The laughter in the class, in the school hallways, around the town just doesn't ring in my ears anymore.

In couple of years from now (and then some more and then some more), will the good memories I made in the past few years die down as well? Just remain pictures without sound or motion or emotions?? Here's the deal - I am not ready to let go!! Not unless I make some new ones which make my heart flutter !!

I think the question really is whether you want to let go and how do you know if you do!!

90 minutes at Bannerghatta National Park

June 2017 brought along the pleasure of family time when my parents and sister visited us in Bengaluru. My sweet (pun intended) lil sister had just one simple demand - "I don't want to waste my holidays sitting at home". So I being the ideal (no pun intended) elder sister 😇 scoured all the Bengaluru tours and must-visit lists to find places we should visit. One constant entry on the lists happened to be Bannerghatta National Park which also happened to be just 25 km from my home (close by Bengaluru standards). There are a lot of good articles and posts about what to do at the park when you are spending an entire day but not enough has been written about what to do when you are short on time. So I am sharing my experience with you about how I spent just about 90 minutes at the national park and made the best of it.